Wednesday, March 4, 2009 it here yet?

Steve gets to come home for the weekend on Thursday and doesn't have to go back until Sunday night. He may possibly be discharged next weekend or the weekend after. I'm really excited for him to be home for good, but I can patiently wait for the next couple of weeks to come.
Last weekend we got to spend time with Hunter. We took him to my nephew's, Russell, birthday party at Jungle Jim's Playland. It was a lot of fun and tiring at the same time. My niece, Violet, fell asleep on one of the rides, it was adorable!
I am trying to take some time off next week so I don't have to be to work on the one year anniversary of my miscarriage. I'm afraid that I'll be too emotional to work. I made an journal right after it happened so that I would have the entire experience down on paper (the reasoning was that if it was on the paper it wouldn't be inside me anymore and I could heal). I still remember certain things vividly. The worst was that after I realized that I was losing the baby I tried to call my mom. I figure that since I had stopped crying I would be able to tell her what was going on. Fat chance. I told her and started sobbing so I had to get off the phone.
I actually could have died if I hadn't gone to the ER. I was losing so much blood that I had to have a D&C. The OB/GYN said that my body was trying to "get rid" of everything and there was something that was not being "flushed out" so I would have bled to death. I almost had to have a blood transfusion. Steve sat there thinking that he was watching me die. Because of the large amount of blood that I lost I was VERY weak and it took SOOOO much energy to get up and walk the 25 feet to the bathroom.
Sorry if this was too graphic for some, but it is a little therapeutic to write this kind of stuff down.

1 comment:

  1. That is why I have my blog! I feel a since of relief after i type it all. I could write and sometimes do!